Florida

Over spring break (or what was left of the break after journal competition) I headed south to Florida to visit my parents for some r&r (and to write my appellate brief - can you tell I'm feeling a little burnt out on law school right now?). Any how, it was a great visit to a place that encourages laziness - what with the cars that never rust and are required to go anywhere, and the lack of bike paths, and the heat and the sun and the oh-so-wonderful pools and beach. My days consisted primarily of a mini-tennis, a mini-run, and maximum pool lounging. Here are two highlights from the visit.

Moola

There is an elephant in the living room, and its name is money. No surprise, (considering this is the number one topice of disagreement in couples) S. and I have our differences about how we manage and spend money. The good thing is, we're not afraid to talk about it, and sometimes we come to good comprimises. In anticipation of the upcoming nuptuals, and the possibile merging of finances, I'm curious how other people have navigated shared expenses. Do you make a budget together, do you have separate accounts? Do you keep a tally of where your money goes?

Twins!

I was at the house of a high school friend (who in real life I haven't seen since graduation in '98) and several other of my high school crowd were pregnant. They were all showing off their beautiful baby bumps, and discussing how far along they were. I joined right in.

A.B. (another high school buddy I have entirely lost touch with): "I'm 17 weeks."

Me: "Oh, S. (my fiance) is 18 weeks along (Boys, in my dreams, they can have babies, weeeee!!!!). In fact, oh no! it's noon already! I am supposed to meet him for the sonogram. We're finally going to get to see what sex the twins are (TWINS, oh my!).

A.B.: "Wow, twins! That's incredible"

Me: "Yeah, it's going to be a hard labor, but I'm going to attend all the lamaze classes so that I can be as helpful as possible every step of the way. (Me, grinning madly thinking about all the pain that I won't have to endure).

A.B.: "But how are you going to feed them."

Me: (Clearly, my subconscious is now struggling to make sense of the dream scenario it has concocted) "Um, ah, um, well with twins it's tough to keep up with their demand anyway, so we're going with formula." (Weeeeeee, I've figured out the solution, men can have the babies and we can avoid the whole pumping issue entirely)

Sherry mentions the way that breast-feeding automatically changes the ability of parents to equally share certain infant duties. Clearly, my subconscious couldn't agree more.

Missing a Page

It's day two of the journal competition, offically day one of spring break (ha). I have concluded that my Blue Book is missing a page --- you know, the page that starts with the subsection "Every Weird Document that Doesn't Fit into One of the Other Inane Categories Listed in This Book."

Baby-ful Weekend

Last Saturday S. and I headed north to New York. He was fulfilling his godfather-duty at a christening and I was along for the ride and a visit to my cousin.

Highlight: During the christening, just as the priest was calling on the young children to "reject sin", beautiful baby So., dressed in a most demure christening gown, threw her legs in the air and performed a perfect spread eagle.

Lowlight: Sharing one bathroom between 9 adults and four children.

The weekend was full of babies and pregnancy talk and breastfeeding and formula mixing. We stayed in Brooklyn (Flatbush to be more precise - and every time I say it I think of the joke: "what do nylons and Brooklyn have in common?"), which is a virtual breeding ground with young families packed into fixer-uppers that look like more work than raising the kids!

Spending all this time with young, newly minted parents makes me think about what it must have been like for my parents when I joined them. With the best good humor, there were many instances this weekend where we laughed AT these babies and their tantrums (did my parents do that? it seems kind of disrespectful, and yet it's impossible not to giggle, I'm sure they did). I guess if I had a younger sibling I would have seen a baby-parent model, but as an only child, and with my memory being as it is, I only have an inkling of how my parents parented from the 3rd grade onward.

I do recall going to parties with my parents and hanging with the other kids, happily playing with legos while the grown ups drank beer and laughed loudly in the other room. It was a little strange - those parties gave me an awareness that my parents were more than just my parents. I remember sometimes being a bit weirded out by it all and not quite sure how I fit in when they were in this other role.

Now, here I am on the other side, no kids yet, but I'm part of these parents' "other life", not the kid in the other room wondering what the adults are finding so funny. And it's not strange afterall. It's perfectly normal that these parents love their children with all their hearts and still like to p-a-r-t-y.