Staying Put

Today, my plans changed. As I've mentioned elsewhere on this site, I get horribly ill when traveling. I have yet to master the art of traveling on an airplane without using the airsickness bag. Nonetheless, I've traveled overseas and across the country many times. As I've gotten older I've managed to overcome the sheer hell that is air-travel by the power of positive thinking (and the use of prescription drugs that help ameliorate the situation by a few degrees) -- it's a finite amount of time that I spend in the air and I'm always rewarded with great experiences and time spent with family and friends once on the ground.

Following my last day of work in June, I had the following itinerary set up: June 24-July 4, Netherlands; July 12-July 18, California (2 days in Berkeley and 2 days at Lake Tahoe); July 20-28, Philadelphia, New York, New Haven, Boston, Amherst, Maine; July 28-31, DC; August 1-14 Maine. The plan was to visit as many loved ones as possible and avoid the thick southern heat.

But after this morning's run, my stomach revolted and my psyche crumbled. I've hardly adjusted back to EST after returning from vacation across the pond, S. is adjusting to a frantic hospital schedule, and my head was spinning at the idea of having a total of five days at home in DC this summer before starting law school in August. I like to challenge myself, but today I learned that I'd made the grave mistake of pushing too far, too much, too little recovery, and underestimating the sadness I felt leaving S. behind for nearly a whole summer. I was overwhelmed and unable to rally. I've never cancelled before, but this time it seemed like the right choice.

One of the worst parts about canceling, aside from knowing that I was missing out on time spent with people I love, was the feeling that I was disappointing my grandfather and dear friend, H. I called them both in tears and worried they would be upset. I should have known better; I should have remembered that these people care for and love me. Both H. and my grandfather were incredibly understanding, and I'm far better off this evening, on the ground instead of in the air. H. and Grandpa, my extreme gratitude for your patience and kindness.