Tutoring

Tutoring: Once a week I tutor a fourth grader. She’s got wonderfully long black hair, the sweetest shy smile, and she really likes pink. When we see each other we both light up. Our mutual fondness has been built very quietly over the school year. I’ve worked in mentoring/tutoring roles before and usually there are a few kids that I relate to, if not because I see part of myself in them than because they remind me of someone I know/knew growing up. The reflection of something familiar is the in-road to forming a friendship. However, with this little girl, I’ve yet to find that hook. She and her mother and sister immigrated from Mexico about two years ago. From what I’ve pieced together, here she lives with her mother, father, and nine other siblings, some of who’s names she seemed to have trouble remembering. I haven’t been able to figure out what her dad does for a living – since she doesn’t know – but it’s something that allows the family to travel to various US cities. She has a brother (who’s apparently a twin) with an uncle in China, and lots more family still in Mexico. The fuzzy image I have about her home life and the limited amount of time we spend with together, and her difficulty expressing her thoughts in English (I unfortunately don’t speak Spanish) have all made it tough for me to find my hook. And yet, we light up each time we see each other. We happily scootch our chairs close as we conquer word problems, multiplication tables, and reading. When we play “educational games” we sometimes laugh, a little.

She struggles with school work, and while I’m having fun figuring out the ten different ways to solve “what time the train arrives at the station” and marveling at just how cool math is, her mind is tying itself in knots trying to remember 2x6. It’s a good exercise in patience, and creative thinking – trying to elicit the correct answer by repeating yourself is NOT effective. I have no idea what kind of support she gets in school, and I’m also a little out of touch with what qualifies as fourth grade academic competence, but I hope that someone recognizes that she needs extra help and is reaching out to her. During our hour and a half, there are always exciting small triumphs, moments when it seems that a concept suddenly crystallizes – though the clarity usually dissolves by the next problem.

When her mom comes to pick her up, we smile at each other and I ask her eagerly, “So I’ll see you next week, right?”, and then wave at the trio as they stroll away. I yearn to understand this girl’s life better and pull her out of her shell just a little bit more, but in the meantime, our friendship is testament to the power of simple human connection that happens when both people come to the table with their palms up.